Concritathon

[indri]

Text pinched from peasant_ and deadsoul820.

This is my post for peasant_'s Concritathon. Anyone who wants to give me public concrit for Descent is very welcome to do so here. Anyone who would rather send the concrit privately, my address is archaeoindri@yahoo.com.

According to the rules of the concritathon:

Concrit is Constructive Criticism. This means that it must point out at least one, preferably more, flaws in the story as well as at least one, preferably more, good points in the story. It must also be written so as to inform the author of your opinion without hurting their feelings.

Ta.

Comments

[speakr2customrs.livejournal.com]

I've read estephia's critique and I don't think that her comment about the lack of a sense of danger in the fight scenes is relevant. We already know that Spike survives - this is a 'fill in the blanks' story not an AU - and therefore there really isn't much point in trying to inject artificial drama into the fights. I think that if you had done so it would have drawn too sharp a line between the real and the unreal and weakened the overall effect.

[estepheia.livejournal.com]

there really isn't much point in trying to inject artificial drama into the fights.
There is nothing artificial about drama in a fight, in fact, the absence of drama is what makes the fight scenes artificial.
Also, strong, active verbs are not just reseved for action scenes. The important thing is that a writer knows the difference and chooses deliberately. The weak verbs are often the ones that pop into our heads first. That's one of the things revision is for, swapping weak verbs for strong ones.

And yes, I agree that the story works without an emphasis on drama. That's what I said in my critique:

the scenes lack in drama, especially when weak verbs take over. That may well be deliberate, and it’s not something that distracts greatly from the overall impact of the story.

:-)

Oh, and just for the record, it's Estepheia. ;-)

[speakr2customrs.livejournal.com]

Oh, and just for the record, it's Estepheia. ;-)

I've just been looking back at my recs in Fanfic Author Appreciation Week (for an unrelated reason) and I've spotted that I spell your name wrong there too.

[estepheia.livejournal.com]

Hee. You do know there's a special hell for people who spell my name wrong, right? But I left the back door unlocked so you can sneak out any time. ;-)

I just glanced at your author appreciation posts and discovered that there's a NFA story about Miranda. For that I whole-heartedly thank you. She's allways been one of my favorites. In fact, one of her fics got me into fanfic altogether. :-)